


Good For The Soul

by DGCatAniSiri



Category: Vampire Diaries (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-22
Updated: 2014-06-22
Packaged: 2018-02-05 18:52:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,797
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1828564
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DGCatAniSiri/pseuds/DGCatAniSiri
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Klaus's ritual with the moonstone is over and Jenna and John are dead, there's some time for reflection.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Good For The Soul

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written during the hiatus between Season 2 and Season 3, obviously now wildly out of step with canon.

Of the things that Jeremy hated about cemeteries, the one thing he hated most was how... fresh and new they smelled. Cemeteries were where the dead were laid to rest. They shouldn’t smell like fresh grass and cherry blossoms and roses and all that other bright and cheery crap. They were places of death, they should fit the part. There shouldn’t be grass and blossoming flowers and budding trees. All it did was make for a lousy attempt at covering up the fact that cemeteries were where the dead go to rest. 

Jeremy didn’t normally come to visit his parents. That had been Elena’s pastime. He kept the past where it was. But now Jenna and John were gone, Jenna killed by Klaus, John by the spell to save Elena’s life. Some part of him resented Elena for being the cause of the deaths of the two parental figures that Jeremy had left, but she was also all he had left right now. He couldn’t hate her. Though she wasn’t exactly his favorite person at the moment because of it. 

Right now, though, he needed to be away from Elena and Stefan and even Bonnie. He just needed to be able to think. Since he’d done his best to avoid coming here in the past, no one would find him. He found a nice place in the shade of a tree, sat down against it, and started to let his mind wander.

He’d been there for about an hour when he heard the unexpected sound of footsteps approaching. He looked up to see Tyler Lockwood approaching him. “Hey,” he said as he neared Jeremy.

Jeremy responded in kind with an acknowledging nod of his head. He didn’t know why Tyler was there, or even really why he’d come over to him, and, really, he still wanted to be alone, but they’d settled into a near-friendship following Vicki and Mayor Lockwood’s deaths, so he wasn’t going to toss all of that away by metaphorically biting Tyler’s head off and telling him to go away.

Tyler sat down next to him, and then got curious. “You mind if I sit here?”

Jeremy shrugged. “Go ahead.” Sure, he wanted to be alone, but at the same time, being alone had just left him going over the same old crap in his head for the millionth time. Maybe having Tyler around would actually help. After all, he was probably the one person in this town besides Elena who had any idea what he was going through. And for right now, he couldn’t look at Elena without seeing Jenna and John. If he was going to talk to someone and get his head on straight, of the people he could talk to, Tyler was at the top of the list.

There was a moment of silence from the both of them. And then Tyler turned to Jeremy and words seemed to pour out of his mouth. “I didn’t know. About... the ritual, I mean. I didn’t know that... Klaus wanted to kill Elena, that... all of this would happen because of... I just... I was trying to find a place where I could understand this weirdness that’s happened to me since...”

Jeremy cut him off. “Tyler, you don’t have to explain.”

But Tyler shook his head, pressing on. “No, I... I have to say this now. I-”

Something in the way Tyler was looking at him caused something inside Jeremy to snap and he looked away as he cut Tyler off. “I knew about Mason getting...” He swallowed and shifted uncomfortably. “I was there when... Damon killed him.” He closed his eyes, waiting for Tyler’s reaction.

For a moment, the only sound was the light blowing of the wind. Jeremy waited expectantly, preparing himself for the worst from Tyler, maybe even being torn apart by his werewolf side kicking in and causing him to snap. After a very long moment, Tyler spoke again. “That was why you started avoiding me. I thought it was just that... I’d killed someone and triggered the curse.” 

A calm statement hadn’t been what Jeremy had expected. An angry outburst, a beating, maybe even just Tyler storming off. Not a statement that seemed to imply that Tyler understood what had happened. 

Jeremy’s surprise and confusion must have been visible. “Damon did it. Vampire versus human... No way you could have stopped him. You’d have been killed and he’d still have done it. I get that.” He let out what was either a grim chuckle or a scoff, Jeremy couldn’t quite tell. “I wouldn’tve if you’d told me before I left, but... With the whole werewolf thing... After everything that Jules helped me figure out about this... I don’t know. Maybe it made me... mature.”

Neither of them could keep a straight face at that thought. Seconds after admitting that Jeremy had been in the same room as Mason when he was killed, and they were sharing a joke. That either meant they were both well-adjusted and understanding or that their lives were so fucking weird that this could actually be something that they let slide. And this was a conversation between a guy with a ring that prevented him from dying and a werewolf. That spoke for itself.

“Or maybe I just... I get the lengths you go to protect the people you love. Mason... I don’t know how much he knew about the curse, but... he would have killed Elena if it meant breaking it. And Klaus... Klaus probably would have killed him for the ritual anyway.” All of the werewolves in Mason and Jules’ pack would have killed Elena before letting Klaus break the ritual once they learned that it was about him being a hybrid. Tyler shook his head, banishing the thought. “And... you just lost your aunt and uncle. Hard to be pissed at you right now.” There was that. Sympathy could go a long way. Tyler sighed. “When did our lives get so damn complicated?”

Jeremy smirked. “Probably around the time we met Vicki.” They paused for a moment, thinking about the girl they’d loved and lost. By now, both of them knew that Damon Salvatore had turned her, and that Elena had been forced to kill her to protect Jeremy. The memories associated with that pain had been taken away from Jeremy by Damon, but he didn’t even mind that as much as he used to. He’d been in a bad place then, and forgetting all of that had helped him to get clean.

“Caroline said that you and Bonnie are together now.” Jeremy nodded. Tyler seemed to be considering that for a minute, which Jeremy found odd. “You know, I wouldn’t have pictured that.”

“Why not?” 

Tyler shrugged, uncertain. “Just... she doesn’t seem like your type.”

“And you know my type?” Jeremy asked with a raised eyebrow. 

“Well, we were both crazy about Vicki. I figure that’s a good starting point.” Jeremy would give him that one. If he had a type, Vicki would be a good starting point for figuring it out. And Anna had a few similarities to Vicki, he supposed. 

“So what’s wrong with Bonnie?”

It was strange seeing Tyler seem this nervous. The confident jock who had made Jeremy’s life difficult all through his time with Vicki had given way to this very... human person beside him. Jeremy didn’t expect that the asshole side of Tyler was gone forever, but now at least he was someone who Jeremy could consider a friend. 

Tyler struggled with words for another few moments, then sighed. “I don’t know. There’s nothing wrong with her. I just... think it’s weird that the two of you are together. I guess I don’t get why you’re together.”

“Maybe... I needed someone else, someone different, after Vicki and Anna,” Jeremy said. This was not the conversation he’d ever expected to have with Tyler. Truthfully, he’d never really expected a conversation with Tyler would ever be this casual. “Why do you care so much, anyway? You’re with Caroline now, right?”

That got a laugh out of Tyler. “With her? No. No. We just... we were able to relate to each other, since we got all... supernatural-y at about the same time. She... helped me when you weren’t there.” It was funny. Not too long ago, if a hot girl like Caroline Forbes had been spending this much time around him, he would have tried something. So far, he’d chalked it up to her being his best friend’s girlfriend and off limits, but... Hell, he probably would have tried something all the same. He was, after all, the same asshole who had made out with Matt’s mom. And since Matt had found out about Caroline being a vampire, he had gotten pretty cold towards her, so they were probably broken up anyway. And he hadn’t made any move on her.

Tyler knew that he should be curious about that, wondering why he didn’t have any interest in this hot chick who was spending all this time around him. But right now, it wasn’t what he wanted to focus on. He looked to Jeremy, wanting to say something about why he thought he and Bonnie were a strange match. 

He hadn’t expected to lean into a kiss.

“What was that?” Jeremy exclaimed as he pulled back. Tyler didn’t have an answer – he hadn’t even realized that he was going to kiss Jeremy until after he’d started. He fumbled for something to say for a moment, but then got another surprise when Jeremy kissed him, a hand coming up to gently run his fingers through Tyler’s hair. Tyler responded by tangling his own fingers in Jeremy’s. 

The need for oxygen forced them apart. As they sucked down lungfuls of air, things began to click in both of their minds – they’d originally fought over Vicki, but... something had lingered between them after her death. It hadn’t been rivalry, they’d thought it was a growing friendship and respect for each other... But had it maybe been attraction. That it had been... the only way that they had been able to express their feelings for each other.

They were quiet for a long moment, looking to each other, trying to figure out what had just happened between them.

“Why did you... Why did we...” Jeremy seemed to be struggling to find an explanation other than the obvious. Tyler understood. All things considered, he thought their roles should be reversed, Jeremy being fairly calm about having out of the blue kissed a guy he’d thought he’d hated for so long while he was freaking out about the fact that he, Tyler Lockwood, mayor’s son, the jock, the big man on campus, the guy who could make girls swoon with a look, had just made out with another guy. And he wasn’t even trying to justify it to himself as having just not gotten any in so long or that he was confused and sympathetic for what Jeremy was going through. But Tyler had had to grow while he was out with Jules and the pack and learning about what it was to be a werewolf, and Jeremy had a girlfriend now. Tyler had seen how he’d been about Vicki. When Jeremy was in a relationship, he was in it, not going out and making out with other people. And yet... He’d been just as active in the kiss as Tyler had been.

“Jere.” 

Jeremy looked to him, still struggling to understand what just happened. “What was that?”

Tyler couldn’t resist a smirk – the answer was obvious enough. “We just made out.” 

“I know that but... Why? I mean... We hate each other... Don’t we?”

Tyler reached out, placing what he hoped was a comforting hand on Jeremy’s shoulder. He jumped slightly at the motion, but he didn’t shake it off. It didn’t necessarily mean that he was going to accept this all, but it was a start. “I stopped hating you a while back. I wouldn’t have stuck around here if I hated you.”

“Then what... I’m with Bonnie.” He sounded almost like he was trying to convince himself of it, that he knew it was what he should be doing, but wasn’t what he wanted.

Tyler didn’t know what he wanted, and certainly not what Jeremy wanted. But he’d liked kissing Jeremy. He would not be against doing it again. Something about it... It had been awkward and messy and they hadn’t really put their hands in the right places... But it had been really nice. Tyler hadn’t ever considered anything with another guy before, but with Jeremy, he honestly felt like there might actually be something worthwhile in trying it out, that he genuinely WANTED to try things with Jeremy.

On Jeremy’s side, he was about convinced that he was on the verge of a panic attack. This wasn’t the first time he’d kissed a guy (though it was the first time he’d done it sober, since Vicki had said she found it really hot during one of their first stoned hazes, when he was just trying to impress this hot older girl and not her specifically), but... The way his heart had flipped when Tyler’s lips had found his was completely different from the reaction he’d had with Vicki or Anna or Bonnie. 

But it was wrong. He had feelings for Bonnie. He’d been the one pursuing her over the last few months, and now... Now here he was, openly making out with Tyler. How did that make sense? It didn’t. It just didn’t. He wanted to be with Bonnie... But he also wanted Tyler. He didn’t know what was going on with him, with the feelings that were at war inside him. Doing this was wrong... and yet it felt RIGHT.

“Tyler... What are we doing?”

“I don’t know. But it felt good.”

And, Jeremy realized, the damning thing was, he agreed with Tyler. It had been good. There’d been a spark, a feeling of there being... SOMETHING there, something that he hadn’t felt with Bonnie. 

With that realization, Rational Jeremy should have stepped in and gotten him out of there as fast as he could. Instead, he leaned in for another kiss, this one still having the same heat, spark, and passion as the last two, but also an undercurrent of tenderness. Tyler gently cradled his head and Jeremy savored the taste of Tyler’s lips. 

But he pulled back before it got too deep. “Tyler... I need...”

Tyler was still holding to him, his eyes closed, leaning in close to nuzzle at Jeremy’s neck. Jeremy’s head swam with at their closeness. “What do you need, Jere?” Tyler asked, his voice low and husky with desire. 

“Tyler...” Jeremy wanted to stay, he wanted to leave... He didn’t know what he wanted. He pushed against Tyler, who finally pulled back.

“What’s wrong?” Tyler asked, surprise on his features at the sudden stop. He’d missed the signs of Jeremy’s war with himself over just what to do about all these new conflicting feelings, and only read on the reactions Jeremy was giving him, which had been heavily favored in the ‘keep going’ fashion

“I... I don’t know what I’m doing... And I’m still...”

Tyler remembered what he’d thought earlier, how Jeremy wasn’t the cheating kind. He wasn’t going to just stop being with Bonnie because he’d (Tyler figured) found something that was more satisfying. Jeremy needed to talk and think before making a choice like that. 

Not long ago, Tyler wouldn’t have cared. He’d have kept at it and tried to get Jeremy to give in, worn him down. But not now. He saw the conflict running across Jeremy’s face and he knew that if he pushed... Jeremy would break. Something important about him would just crack and die, a part of him that made him who he was, that made him who Tyler was... starting to admit, to himself, if no one else, attracted to. 

So he pulled back. He didn’t know what to say and just stared at Jeremy, waiting for him to make the next move, which turned out to be getting up.

“I... I don’t... I need to think about... all of this.” He looked to Tyler with a pleading look of his puppy dog eyes. “Just... just give me some time, okay?”

Tyler nodded. “Yeah. Okay.” Jeremy summoned up a smile, which happened to look very pained and pulled himself up and headed out of the cemetery, moving for the exit quickly. Tyler didn’t know what was coming next. Emotions were whirling in his head, probably just as much as they were with Jeremy.

The thing that stuck with him, though, was that he hoped that he and Jeremy weren’t going to leave things there.


End file.
